Soulstice 2010

Preparing for Soulstice was the most challenging thing I have ever had to do, but it is definitely the most rewarding experience. It is my favorite week of the summer because I love camping, worshipping God outdoors, and watching Christ transform the hearts and lives of junior high kids. I spent many days crying because I was so overwhelmed with the details. I am perfectionist so it was difficult to let go of tasks, to delegate them, and to settle for simplicity when I want something to be the best. I sure learned quickly the simplicity can be the best. I also learned that I can still have a say in whatever I delegate. I learned that other people have unique talents and creative ideas. I recognized quickly that God has surrounded me with people not only for emotional support but to physically support and help me with what I need. The weekend before we left for Soulstice was a challenging one. So much needed to get done, and I wanted to hit my goal of 100 kids! I am only one person and I was pushing my body to the extreme. I did not hit my goal, and the struggle of realizing that I would not hit that goal was so tough to handle. My greatest fear is failure, and I felt that if I did not hit 100 kids I would be letting people down. I knew deep down and frequently prayed that God would bring who he wanted to Soulstice, no matter what target goal I had for myself. But then the weekend came where I learned I only had 78 kids and 13 CITS. 91 was not my goal but Christ’s goal, and I had to accept and realize that this year is just a building year. It is my first year planning and executing Soulstice on my own at a different lake – one that is further and many parents may not be comfortable with their kids going so far away. Though I cried every single night of the week prior to Soulstice and multiple times the weekend of, I tried to be strong, to look and act strong when deep down inside I questioned why God was using me. What did he see in me? I am only 21, with very little life experience. I have a deep passion for junior high and I can relate to a lot of their struggles, but I am so weak and young. Why put this much stress and responsibility on my shoulders? Well, what a laugh this is looking back on it. The theme for the week was “Rend your heart” based on Joel 2:12-13 that says rend your hearts and not your garments. Return to the Lord for he is gracious and merciful. The whole week we would be studying what it means to be broken before the Lord, that God wants our broken pieces because he makes us perfect, that we need to surrender our life and our struggles, and that repentance leads to restoration. Only God can restore us when we come to Him first, broken and torn in pieces. WOW. So I here I stand bawling my eyes out like a baby when I am reminded that this is where God wants me. I had to get to this place because then He could show off His power and glory in my life. 2 Corinthians 12:9 says his power is made perfect in weakness. Well, duh. I am weak and I allowed Him to use me as I led such an important and life-changing week where many souls would be harvested and changed in this summer Soulstice. Some verses that really spoke to me the weekend before Soulstice: Galatians 6:9-10 “And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all, especially those who are of the household of faith.” and Psalm 23 specifically “He restores my soul. He makes me to lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters”. And Psalm 27 “The Lord is my light and my salvation: whom shall I fear? The Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?” It was the most incredible week – the best Soulstice yet. It went so smoothly. Of course it was tiring and I am still exhausted four days after it. But it went wonderfully and because it was so organized, I delegated, relied on other people’s strengths, and trusted the Lord, I actually had time to jump in the water and hang out with kids. Of course I did not do it alone. I had an incredible team of people who love God and want to bring kids to the Kingdom. That’s really what is all about. God used all of our talents and strengths and even our weaknesses which he meshed together to create something powerfully amazing. Oh how I desire to be sweetly broken by Him because He can use me for great things. And the reward was granted to me the last night when we were singing Lead me to cross whre your love pours out and I saw many of the kisd like these two hear with arms raised high, hearts abandoned, surrendering their all to Christ.